March 23, 2010

Feeling whiny

How do you ever know when you're grown up enough to be responsible for yourself? How do you know when you no longer need to be fed and pampered and taken care of? How do you know when you're old enough to find a job and keep at it?

Aside from the fact that marriage to my (then) boyfriend is the most magical thing that's ever going to happen to me, I realise it comes with a bucket-load of responsibilities. No more sleeping till noon just 'cos I feel like it, no more skipping college (and soon work) just because I'm lazy or my hair looks crappy, no more waiting to be served at the dining table myself, no more magically washed and ironed clothes on my bed... the list, quite frankly, is both long and scary. I try to tell myself to suck it up and well, gear up for everything to come. I mean, my fiance does it. And without whining. How tough can it be?!

Oh who am I kidding?! I'm a pseudo adult. I like being fed when I'm tired and grumpy. I hate most household chores (washing vessels and dusting being exceptions) and bribe my brother to do them for me. I rarely cook 'ghar ka khaana', it's mostly pizza, pasta type of stuff that no one can eat on a daily basis. Plus you know what my ideal day is? Wake up, watch a movie, eat, bathe (sometimes), watch another movie, eat, watch HIMYM or Ugly Betty or... you get the damn picture, don't you?!!!

And this may be slightly unrelated but I'm scared of moving to France as well. It's a new country, a new city, a new job (hopefully) and a new college (HOPEFULLY). And I'm oddly quiet around new people - which by the way, is something I didn't discover till the last few days of college when EVERYONE told me, "Oh you came across as quite a snob" (except replace 'snob' with 'stuck up bitch'!) I never thought I'd say this, but I want to stay in India. And not just that, I want to stay with my in laws in Madras. If my fiance's reading this, he's going to be very surprised and I cannot blame him because one of the first times that the possibility of staying with his parents came up, I was less than glad. But I LOVE them now! And I want to stay with them and take care of them. And help around the house and all, but not so much that the word 'housework' make me feel queasy, you know? And of course, they dote on me as well and my dad in law totally takes my side over ka's so yeah, it'd be great if we could do that. But of course - not happening.

Anyhoo, this rant has run its course and I'd just like to say that I DO love ka with all my heart and I'm absofreakinlutely EXCITED about the life that we're going to live together. As long as he does most of the housework and cooking. And you know, gets me a TV. :D

11 people had something to say:

Dhanya said...

I am facing the same problems. And to consider that I'm going to get married sooner plus I'm elder to you :P The jitters remain the same...

Luscious Sealed Lips said...

Aaaww Ki.

All of this is one those 'pre marital jitters'. Come on. Everything will fall in place. He loves you. You love him. You both are finally marrying. What more could you want? The rest just follows smoothly. Don't panic. He will take care of you and other things. And yes, you will have to do the same. :)

All the Best, my girl.


Sakshi said...

Doncha worry babes, I am sure things will work out for the best. These are the usual jitters of the bride to be. What is more important is to know the fact that there is someone who loves you for what you are, and waking up next to that person, every morning for the rest of your life, is THE best gift that God can ever give anyone.
As far as house works goes, well, Responsibilities come with time. Everything happens when it has to happen. So, slowly you both will learn and that learning curve is what you are going to look back to after years of marriage and laugh and feel happy about.
Time to start making memories of a life time.
Love you girl.
God Bless, and BE HAPPY.

Jack said...


Just relax. When time comes you will shoulder your responsbilities with grace and come out with flying colours. I am sure you will adjust when you are in France. How long is he supposted to be there? Do spend time with his parents as much as you can without making him feel lonely.

Take care

Chandrika Shubham said...

Nice style of writing!!! :)
Enjoyed reading it. :)

Pavitra .... said...

Hey Ki...Don't you worry. Its really normal to feel like this. But look at the bright side. You are marrying the love of your life. What more can you ask for? You are really very lucky, you know that gurl?? I'm sure everything will be fine when you go to France. You take care and stop worrying :)

The Bald Guy said...

Act smart.

Quiz future prospective to be hubby if his cooking dinner for five speed is less than one hour certified with three dishes and one desert.

If he answers affirmative, marry him.

Or else, NEXT!

Di said...

but i know you'll manage... every woman does.. eventually...

Di said...

i knoooooooooowwww..... No getting up WHEN YOU WANT TO.. biggest problem for me....

Neha said...

hahaha LOL @ ending =))
anyway your post made me really think of my future! :O


Americanising Desi said...

awwwww it sure wont stay forever :) you ll laugh back at it!